Random facts:

• Laptops have feeling too…and they die. Charge them regularly.
• Cockroaches run away when we touch them because they are scared…scared of our germs so they also wash their bodies while shouting “AHHHH HUMANS DID TOUCH MEYY!!!”. Of course we can’t hear them. We might know. (I did now). 
• My sister talk to herself all the time and she defends it. I think she deserves a world of her own.
• My heart is solid so as yours.
• Dreams do come true but remember, nightmares are also dreams.
• Spongebob is actually a kitchen sponge. 
• I whip my hair back and fork. Let’s eat. I’m always hungry.
• I’m hungry.

So there, last week I just had the most random feeling that something is not right for the day that I decided not to go to the office. I instead drenched myself to too much comfort by designing my nails and my hair. Tried the nail polish that my friend gave me last V-day. I have this long nails already since I am a lazy girl who do not cut them. French tip cracking nails eh?:)

I also tried to practice curling my hair using the flat iron. It was fun and very easy! After all these dwelling on Youtube and blog tutorials, finally I was able to do it right. I even styled my friend last college event that we had.

Yesterday, I also had the same weird feeling of having crappy aura in the air. Similar to this day that I was absent, yesterday was worse since I was in the office. I was very absent-minded and disoriented. It can be seen in my tweets that I was complaining the whole day. I do not know if it was something I ate or what. I was saying the wrong words, writing the wrong letters, sending the wrong files and not smiling a bit.

Last night, I just had a good cry. I do not know if I was crying but there are tears falling. I am not emotional or anything but it just happened. I also reminisced about my past that I tended to even bother my already stressed boyfriend since he is taking care of his newly operated grandfather. I slept very very early! After dinner and just passing by my father, not talking to my mother and ignoring my siblings, I went straight to my room and just stared endlessly in my ceiling and thinking of distracting things that can make me more insane. I closed my eyes and ended the day that was not mine.

I do not know if the same thing happened to you too but I promise, that experience was terrible since it ruined everything though there is nothing wrong. Brains, brains. Very playful. My mind is not with me for those days. Sigh.

Today is just a lazy day and when I say lazy, I just blind pick anything that you can wear. Great thing, our school implements school uniform so I do not have to suffer knowing what to wear for the day every single day.

Today, I just decided to wear the shirt I gave my father last Christmas. I tend to wear the shirts of my father or brother during lazy days. I fold the sleeves, tie the bottom end and voila! I’m good to go. My brother wears my shirts though. Haha. Hating kapatid much.

That’s the beauty of being a woman, you can wear a man’s clothing and still look you. ;)) As what Audrey Hepburn said, the measure of sexiness of a woman can be measured not in her feminine clothes but in the clothes of her man. :)

Been munching on to these pastillas de leche and treated it as my brekkie. Just got home from Lucena, a province of my cousin’s hubby and had a fun time buying pasalubong. Add me in foursquare! Rushing lots of things in school and I am really stressed lately. :(

Random post! Hee! ;) March is coming and summer is near! No vacay for me though! Have a nice day ahead!

Going back to school! I feel like professors are not attending classes again. I aim to always tie my hair this year. I am really excited to see my blockmates again. They are the reason that my school days are complete. :) I missed this uniform! :D

When you see me, I want you to remember the good, lightweight feeling and carefree sensation of seeing a random girl smiling at you. We may not know or greet each other but let me remind you that there’s no reason for you not to smile. I too, got lots of problems and burdens in my heart but let the whole world see the constant picture of hope that a smile brings. This world is not yours to carry alone. So why frown and bring yourself more down when a happy curve in you lips is all it takes to start a better outlook in life? :)

“I would always like awake every midnight and I would stare at the dropping fluid on that plastic bottle up above my head. I see them very clearly because everything just flows down through my vain by that needle stabbed in my skin. I feel pain and self-pity for every hour that passes by because I got no one to talk to when supposedly someone should be by my side and holding my hand while asking me what I need or that I will soon be okay. Everybody is asleep and I grow hungry and thirsty but I cannot and should not lift that dextrose or else my blood would go up. Anyway, so I would not become a burden to anyone I would do things on my own. I am the nurse and the patient at the same time. I still lie awake with the pain and longing for my body needs and company. I cannot move or else the long suspended plastic tube  would tangle and the hydration that I need would not flow but the fever made me restless and uncomfortable with any position. I also stare at the bottles of Gatorade, prebiotic drinks and bananas beside me and thinking to myself, I have consumed a lot but still I am sick. I lost my appetite but still I have to eat but even before I finish my chew, I would throw up. My eyes would be teary, my tummy would complain and all I could do is spit all I have and there, I am dry again. I am very weak and I want to cry but what is the use? It was my first time to feel-this-sick sick but felt for the nth time, the worst feeling of having people around yet alone. This always lead me back to my self-note that I would always be left with myself, myself alone.”

For the record, I am better now. I was sick from food poisoning and it was bad. My mother was my doctor (because she really is), little sister was my occasional nurse (because she has classes) and my father was my dietitian. I still throw up at times at the moment but at least I could eat now. I lost two inches in my waist and I do not know for the pounds since I have not weighed myself yet but I know I lost some weight. What a feeling. That feeling of being for yourself only but I have to recognize the efforts of my parents and sibling. They have been taking care of me as much as possible despite the busyness. My little sister also has a dual mission, it is to take care of me and to make sure that I am already okay so that she can have the remaining food and drinks that were bought just for me. Anyway, I felt loved by some people who checked on me. For this experience, I dedicate my recuperation to the people who aimed for it so much.

July is almost ending and I do not know what just happened for this month. I technically saw it as lame and probably not a good birthday month for me. Nevertheless, I will look forward to August and I wish it would be better, bolder and brighter.

• School was really lame too. I read books that I must finish but I don’t. I am supposed to read a 30-page article right now but I am doing nothing for the past two days that was declared as “no classes”. I getting lazier and lazier everyday but I still praise myself for surviving with this rotten attitude of mine.
• I am in a relationship with art again. To be specific, I am drawing again and I reconciled with my colored pencils which my little sister snatched from me. I was surprised with what she did. She sharpened them short and I am totally pissed off. I’m planning to invest in to art materials again like watercolor, canvass and pens.
• I am still looking forward to a lot of things right now. I hope the good Lord will grant those to me.

I need inspiration to be productive again and nothings beats a good sip of your favorite drink soya milk on a day when you can’t think clearly and wisely about things.

Hello to new followers! Let’s interact! :)

July 3, 2011. My 19th birthday.

I really looked forward to this day. Somebody told me that I have to be excited because I will have a second 18th birthday. Second debut. I did actually. In the sense that in both of those birthdays, I cried only for different reasons.

I can really conclude that this is my most tearful birthday. The reason, it’s for me too keep and I know in myself that in times like I have 3 names to always remember and turn to…me, myself and I.

Indeed I have a lot of people in my life and sometimes I still wonder why I feel so alone. [Oops. Same quote!] I never want to filter people but it’s been a sad truth that a lot of them just get in and out of my life. I think I just have to stop over- analyzing things, simplify life and just be contented. I think I just have to dwell on matters that is more important as of the moment like my studies. I will stop drenching my life with so much drama and go on like I usually do. 

Nothing much happened. This is the most plain birthday that I had still I was thankful and always grateful to the people who hanged out with me. I call them my family. They really did a lot of things to entertain me specially my mother. And I want to thank some of the people who knows what I am going through and been helpful to my emotional recovery. You know who you are. My next year is for you. I will make it up to all your countless helps for me. 

I will stop giving much care for the people that will not care for me too. Sorry for the lame “Happy Birthday” picture. I just tried to entertain myself and I just found the frame suitable for this time of the year. Hee. I also adore this new glasses that I have which is in hot pink! Oh, well. Wearing red for the sake of it. Forgive me please!

CYBER KISS!

Today:

• It is Father’s Day and I am home alone since everyone went to my mom who is the hospital. I’m really worried. No news from them yet.
• I need to make a paper of 7 pages but all I have is a paper of 4 sentences. 
• I am still sick. My cough and colds won’t leave me alone plus add my swollen gums due to toothache.
• No TV and luckily internet is available or else my sanity will also be gone.

I need to entertain myself, relax, rest and go back to work. I need concentration in a bottle.

Hey soul sister/ biological sister I don’t wanna miss a single thing you do. Well, I mean it. You keep on playing with my pictures. She said she wants me very white. There goes. Well, I am her favorite subject to manipulate. I love her though she’s very annoying.

Yay for new signature!

I keep holding on to my hair because it keeps falling on my face! I want my long hair back :(

Jai(c) is PUZZLED. STARING. ANGRY. SMILING.

It was just last summer. Time flies so fast. Whatever file my arrow will hover on, I will upload.

Jai(c)

I ♥ Bad Boys.

No not actually. If there’s something heart-able in them, it is most probably their will to fight for you literally. Punch other guys, shower them with bad-ass words and all tough things like that but no, I am not after that. In whatever choices we make, in who to love or who to choose we should keep in mind that we should live life well. It is the only life we have and we are not like cats that have nine lives to waste. 

Self-portrait on a Tuesday night.

Jai(c)

It was just now that I got the chance to download a good webcam software for my laptop. I was just trying it and I can see that I am in my lazy, not-so-good condition. I am going through something right now so I have no smile to produce. Sorry if I am not a sight to see. Plus my hair grows so fast.